Bus

On the bus, a guy was raving about how T bus-drivers don't wear ID badges/name tags and thus are a security threat. He'd repeated the nigh-identical rant to himself while waiting at the bus stop. But on the bus he added this novel line: "next thing you know the buses will be full of al-quaidas* driving around. Am I right? If I'm not right tell me to shut up --"

... and a woman called out "Shut up!"
"Even if you WERE right -- just shut up."

(and he did!)

*apparently, it's a common noun now.